How do you fill up the emptiest booth in the SC09 exhibit hall? With the world’s largest t-shirts, of course. As much as we love our pals at The Register, we couldn’t help taking this picture of their booth on Monday night – during the ‘Exhibit Hall Opening Gala’ and press tour – when we found them featuring… nothing. And no one.

‘Read More’ to see more invective and the damning evidence…

Fortunately, the intrepid Michelle arrived the next day to man the booth (all day, for all three days!) and hand out the 3X/5X/7X shirts someone had ordered by the hundreds. We did our part by helping Michelle convince normal-sized people that these hideously large shirts are their best choice in SC09 freebies. “They shrink a lot. The Register has invested every bit of earnings into farmland in the world’s tea-growing regions. Through these transactions, they have access to exotic cottons that actually shrink to fit the wearer over time. It’s quite advanced technology.”  We also pitched innovative ways to use the t-shirts, like covering cars or swimming pools.

We’re not pointing fingers, but we suspect that the Brit contingent is responsible for the sizing snafu. We figure they bought into the stereotype that we Yanks eat McDonald’s and KFC at every meal and can’t fit into anything smaller. That’s not true. Mostly not.